Manasseh and Ephraim

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Joseph named his older son Manasseh,[a] for he said, “God has made me forget all my troubles and everyone in my father’s family.” Joseph named his second son Ephraim, for he said, “God has made me fruitful in this land of my grief.”

- Genesis 41: 51-52

Will God also make me forget all my trouble -- personal and relational?

Will God make me fruitful in my suffering... in my struggle?

Father God, why am I even struggling again with the father issue? What is it within my heart still that makes it filthy and ugly?

"Unforgiveness," God whispered.

Then help me to forgive, God, and to know that You really are in control.

[Journal entry: January 8, 2013]

From Today Onwards

Today, I make a conscious decision to desire nothing and no one else other than God. Today, I decide to desire and fix my eyes on Jesus. From today onwards, I consciously decide to be madly, crazily in love with JESUS!

I will take off my eyes on things here on earth, and I will set my eyes on what is above.  I will desire for things which are eternal.  And I will make a difference in my generation and to make an impact in God's kingdom.

I carry the banner of Jesus!  I am not alone in this battle. My Lord is with me and He will fight for me!

Let's go God! :-)

Captivate my heart, Jesus! I will live with one purpose in mind:  

to glorify Jesus in every way!

I love You, Lord! :-)

[Journal entry: August 22, 2011]

Thoughts...

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Just when I thought I've moved on, I found myself at the same place...

I have never moved.

[Journal entry dated: July 20,2011]

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Only in Rest will you be able to see My power.

                                                     - God

God impressed this in my heart and I remembered the scripture in 1 Samuel 12:6:

"Now then, stand still and see thius great thing the Lord is about to do before your eyes!"

[Journal entry dated: July 23,2011]

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I may have backslid, but God remains faithful. I praise You, God, for You are faithful to Your children.

[Journal entry dated: July 25,2011]

God is For Me

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People will either be for me or against me. Regardless of it, God is always for me. And... that is unchanging.

People will always have to say something about me whether positive or negative.  What matters is what God says about me and approves of me.

People at some point will frustrate me or disappoint me. But God never will.

[Journal entry: August 9, 2011]

When Daddy God Gives Pinky Promise

Photo credits: 1000awesomethings.com

Hello Tuesday! Thank You, God, for a good morning! I expect good things to happen today. If this day won't bring me any good (if that were possible), it's okay. I am still one day closer to seeing God's promises being fulfilled!

Pain, Trauma, Hurt

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"No, that trauma you faced was not easy. And God wept that it hurt you so; but it was allowed to shape your heart so that into His likeness you would grow."

Pain shapes my heart!

Father God, thank You for allowing me to go through pain, hurt, and trauma. It may always seem "bad" in the process, but the result of such will always have a purpose. Your purpose for me is to become more like Your Son, Jesus.

Father God, as the song goes, You are too wise to be mistaken. You are too good to be unkind. I can always trust Your heart when I don't understand.

Thank You, Father God. Thank You!

[Journal entry: November 29, 2012]

Would You?

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If you were working for a company for six years, and have been praying to God for a promotion and have been expecting it, but was never granted, would you still love God?

If you had been battling an illness, and have been praying to God for healing, but was never granted, would you still love God?

If your marriage was in trouble and you have been praying to God for a resolution but was not granted, would you still love Him?

If you and your spouse were trying to have a baby for quite a time and have been praying for one, God granted your request but only later you found out your baby had an abnormality, would you still love God?

When Jesus Turned Around

When he saw Jesus passing by, he said, "Look, the Lamb of God!" When the two disciples heard him say this, they followed Jesus.  Turning around, Jesus saw them following and asked, "What do you want?" They said, "Rabbi" (which means Teacher), "where are you staying?"  "Come," he replied, "and you will see."  So they went and saw where he was staying, and spent that day with him.  It was about the tenth hour.

John 1:36-39

"What do you want?" was Jesus' first question to the two disciples following Him.  It caught my attention for two reasons: (1) Jesus asked, and (2) Jesus gave a friendly tone which lead to an invitation.  Let me expound on my two points.

No Religion

If anyone considers himself religious and yet does not keep a tight rein on his tongue, he deceives himself and his religion is worthless.  Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself form being polluted by the world.

- James 1:26-27 -

Photo courtesy: The Writing on the Wall

God desires a relationship with us, not religion.  There are many religions in the world, but there is only one God accepts; that is, to look after orphans and widows and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.  It stresses the importance of relationship.  Religion is man-made, but relationship is from God.  Religion cannot save man; relationship with Jesus can. We can do all religious activities, practices, and traditions faithfully and religiously, and yet we do not keep ourselves in check if we act and speak accordingly.

In Solitude and Prayer

Yet the news about him spread all the more, so that crowds of people came to hear him and to be healed of their sicknesses.  But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.

- Luke 5: 15-16

Despite the limelight, Jesus chose to be solitary.  Despite being as the crowd attraction, He chose to be alone and to commune with God through prayer.  After a day's work in His ministry, He never failed to pray to His Father in heaven; before the day started, He recharged His Spirit through prayer. He often did that -- being alone to pray.

A Letter to Daddy

Daddy,

     The other day was unexpected. I didn’t see it coming. It was sudden. I was a bit surprised that out of a simple question about tractor you erupted and said things off topic.  It was better it happened at least I got a glimpse of what’s inside your heart since we seldom talk. Don’t get me wrong. I sure don’t like having arguments with you. But if it’s the only way for us to communicate the deep, hidden things from our hearts, then it’s healthy. 

     About last Sunday, I’m sorry for the things I said that hurt you and displeased you. Please always remember that I don’t intend to harm you, I intend to protect you. But I don’t think I can protect you all the time, only God can. Though I can’t protect you as much as God can, my intentions for you are of pure love and care. 

     Although I may act indifferently, I do love you and respect you daddy. I am not your enemy. I am your ally, your back support, your family, and your only daughter.